Things I have found while running: a dime, friendly dogs, a deflated whoopee cushion, a bee inside my sunglasses, that even slow progress is progress, not-so-friendly dogs, a silver spoon, my second wind, the fact that I like Chrissie Hynde a lot more than I thought I did, answered prayers, the importance of good underwear, the reality that a mile is a mile-no matter how fast you go, spiritual renewal, our local blue heron's favorite spot, myself...
Ps 28:7
The LORD is my strength and my shield;my heart trusts in him, and I am helped.
My heart leaps for joy
and I will give thanks to him in song.
...today I resumed training for the Capitol City Half Marathon, which is on May 4th! Running has been rather hit and miss lately, especially this last week when I took 7 days off to rest an injured knee. Yesterday's run didn't seem to aggravate the knee~thank goodness! It's still not 100%, so I'm keeping my pace slow and not pushing it.
If going to doctor appointments and tests/procedures were a full-time job, lately I would be working over time! Hematologist, gastroenterologist, gynecologist, dentist, retinal specialist, PCP,
neurologist, chiropractor, urologist, rheumatologist, ultrasounds, blood work,
biopsy, mammogram, CT scan, chemotherapy infusions...
My feet are about the same or maybe slightly worse than the last time I checked in. I did try a medication to increase the blood flow to my extremities--nifedipine, a calcium channel blocker. This medication is NOT my friend! It caused a severe reaction including numbness/weakness in my arms and a very high resting heart rate (160) and spike in blood pressure which lasted about 36 hours. After the "epic fail" of nifedipine, I was prescribed a different medication (amlodipine) to try...but I'm too chicken right now! I'm really hoping the warmer weather which is on the way SOMETIME soon (we hope) will help my feet. So, I guess you could say I'm in denial...
Lupus has been toying with my autonomic nervous system again, causing an increase in palpitations and hypoglycemia. My CNS symptoms of fatigue, dizziness, lupus headaches, and cognitive problems have been increased. People with lupus talk about being "foggy." It's like you are trying to get your brain to swim through jello. I forget words for common things. I can't find my way around familiar stores. I have to concentrate really hard to remember how to get home. Working on our taxes has been...taxing! An illustration of what this fog can do: I wear lip balm to bed every night. On a recent evening, I opened the medicine cabinet (which is not where I store the lip balm) and took out...
...a jar of Vicks Vapo Rub. I opened the jar, got a good gob on my finger and stopped about an inch from my lips. Thank goodness my nose processed that "something is not right here!" That's a mild example. Having to ask a Macy's store clerk to direct you to the entrance back to the mall is another. Pulling off the road to think about whether the route to your house requires a left or right turn is another. During recent conversations with my husband, I told him to get me something "out of that cold thing where we put food" (REFRIGERATOR) and that the item he was searching for was "in that place where we put clothes" (CLOSET). As an English major and "wordy" person, these cognitive problems can be particularly discouraging. Or, they can be funny...it's all a matter of perspective!
Joint pain, dry eyes and mouth...New on my plate are some gynecological issues and gall stones. In July, my rheumetologist and I will be making some decisions about changing/ discontinuing medications. I'm so VERY thankful that I haven't had any respiratory
infections yet this year! Thank you, Lord!
Although the increase in my symptoms has kept me from running as much as I would like, I am very thankful that I've still been able to do some running. A lot of it has been on the dreadmill, but I'm thankful I have that option. A friend of mine recently started running. Her first 5K was a couple of weekends ago, and I told her I'd run one here while she ran hers in Texas. I did the MountainEAR 5K in Morgantown, WV. It was a fundraiser to help provide financial assitance to patients of WVU Audiology. Here's a couple of shots from the run:
I've set a goal of running one half marathon each month for May-November. The "plan" was to stay built up after my first half marathon in January, and complete another in March. Although I had to put the March race on hold, I am still hoping to be able to complete the string of races starting in May. My doctor thinks I'm nuts--I'm not saying she's wrong! We'll see what happens!
So, why running? I don't know...I can't explain it. I feel "called" to do it, by the Lord. I feel like He has something for me to learn through the process of training. I feel like I really spend time with God sometimes when I run. I want Him to use the running to heal my body and spirit. I want Him to use the running to spread awareness about Lupus. I want Him to use the running to inspire others and draw others to Himself. I want Him to amaze me and challenge me and change me and make me grow, and I don't have to understand why running is the vehicle for this. I just have to put one foot in front of the other as often as I feel I can.
Psalm 119:28-32
My soul is weary with sorrow;
strengthen me according to your word.
Keep me from deceitful ways;
be gracious to me through your law.
I have chosen the way of truth;
I have set my heart on your laws.
I hold fast to your statutes, O LORD;
do not let me be put to shame.
I run in the path of your commands,
for you have set my heart free.
Join me in the journey...
